"My marriage hasn’t turned out like I expected…."
Posted by admin in sex on Jan 7th, 2009 | 0 commentsIf you walk into the magazine section of Kroger, Publix, Albertson’s, Winn-Dixie, Barnes and Noble or Borders you’ll find a huge selection of bridal and wedding magazines. In one of the those zillion mags, women everywhere begin their quest for the perfect wedding. The perfect wedding consists of the perfect dress, the perfect venue, the perfect caterer, the perfect cake, the perfect photographer, the perfect tux, and the perfect bridesmaid dresses. Sorry, I forgot the perfect reception. In one of the zillion bridal magazines they find the perfect bridal show to attend so they can make sure their selections are…you guessed it…perfect.
That’s because the bride to be has found the perfect husband…
The groom to be, on the other hand, buys into the whole “perfect” thing because his perfect wedding (remember this is hypothetical) will end in a raucous round of perfect sex. He dreams of the perfect beach, or the perfect cabin, with the perfect adult beverages (non-alchoholic of course), and more perfect…….you fill in the blank for the guy.
That’s because the groom to be has found the perfect wife…
So we find the perfect couple after the honeymoon…a few weeks, months, years, or a couple of decades after the perfect honeymoon having an identical conversation with their friends (seperately, of course) that begin with the phrase, “My marriage hasn’t turned out like I expected….”
Small wonder, if you ask me. Our culture has created a fantasticly idealist perception of marriage…with the hope of the perfect wedding, the perfect spouse, and even the perfect family. No pressure there, right?
So married couples try to live up to that culture induced expectation and, at all cost, look marvelous on the outside, but live miserable lives trying to figure out why marriage hasn’t turned out the way they expected.
So they sit down with a counselor and they hear the phrases idealistic perception and unmet expectations and begin to see how they set themselves up for the perfect disaster.
More on that in the next post…
Welcome to Holy Freaking Matrimony…
Posted by admin in sex on Jan 7th, 2009 | 1 commentI’ve been thinking about doing a marriage blog for a long time. It seems that there’s a need for a good marriage blog. I mean, who doesn’t want to check out or subscribe to a blog that has the ability to at least nudge you to at least think about maybe doing something to make your marriage better?
So…here it is.
Hot topics? You bet. Worth coming back for? Probably. Another Christian sub-culture site with a bunch of fluffy cliches? Nope. This blog is for married people. With or without kids. First, second, or third marriage. Blended, dysfunctional, or Ward and June Cleaver.
Irreverent? Only to legalistic religious types. They probably alread hit the back button on their browser when when the name of the blog popped up in Google anyway.
The content: Marriage (no kidding), parenting, sex (it causes the whole parenting thing), divorce, who gets the remote, adultery, finances, communication, and commentary on anything that has to do with being married. All this through the filter of lessons I’ve learned from being married for over twenty years and being a pastor for over fifteen…and two kids…and a dog.
Hope you come back. Posts will be at least once a week.
